How One Trainer Is Fighting HIV Stigma Through Fitness

This story is part of LGBTQ+ in Fitness, a series of articles that spotlights the trainers, athletes, and gym owners who are making the fitness industry more inclusive for their community. Read the rest of the stories here.

GROWING UP IN Philly, my grandma was our caretaker, ensuring we had essentials like proper nutrition, activity, and church. At 13 years old, overweight and dealing with coming out, I felt lost. I’d been purposefully throwing up my food, and my grandmother noticed. She knew I was struggling with who I was and how I looked. She knew I needed to get into exercise, but I was the only one of my siblings that wasn’t particularly athletic. So, she introduced me to Tae Bo videos with Billy Blanks. We’d do them together in the living room every morning. It was our bonding experience. Seeing him on TV made me think, if this buff Black man can do it, so can I.

I spent the majority of my 20s between NYC and Austin, Texas, where I now reside. When I became a personal trainer, I knew that I would have to work extremely hard compared to most people because of my sexuality and the color of my skin—that’s just a given, being a minority. I knew that would be the biggest challenge to breaking into the industry. That’s why it was important to find a community who understood and supported me.

Early in my fitness career, I started working at an online studio called the Queer Gym. It was a space that understood me—and it was where I eventually learned how important it is to build a space for the trans community. I learned about their process of transitioning and what it takes to build the body to match the mind state that they have. That was the most beautiful thing to be a part of. That experience inspired my mission to build a space to focus specifically on all Black and queer bodies.

In 2021, I started Black and Queer Fitness, a health and wellness company that celebrates and supports the diversity of the Black and queer communities. We offer group fitness classes, nutritional guidance, and personalized training specifically catered to pre-and-post operative transgender individuals. Our mission is to offer a safe haven where people feel a sense of acceptance and can come together to get healthier and stronger, while also providing a sense of belonging and support through fundraising, parties, and events.

As LGBTQ+ leaders and participants in fitness, we need a space that reflects us. I wanted to create a class environment that was as colorful and vibrant as we are. This needed to be a safe space to connect with each person individually. So from the start, I want to know each person’s name and pronouns. I’ll ask something as simple as, “What is your dating life, as a movie title?” It sparks a conversation, excitement, laughter, and [depending on the topic] tears. Then, we push through that moment in movement to become stronger, together. I’ve found strength in sharing many parts of myself with both private clients and my group training clients to find a deeper connection. That includes my journey with HIV.

Before I contracted HIV, I was an advocate [for proper treatment and education about the disease], inspired by a close friend’s journey with the virus. Witnessing his struggle with self-love and grief prepared me to support others, but nothing prepared me for my own diagnosis. The stigma, rejection, and stares were overwhelming. There was a disconnect from almost everyone. I felt like nobody was there for me.

In 2021, when I was diagnosed, I had just started the Men’s Health Strength in Diversity program. This initiative is aimed to empower fitness trainers from underprivileged communities. Overwhelmed, I initially quit, but the fitness director Ebenezer Samuel reached out to me personally, offering unwavering support. He encouraged me to continue, which helped me gain the confidence to share my story. It’s people like him, and another mentor of mine, Jah Washington, that helped me gain confidence in myself. I hope to serve as a mentor to others the way they did for me.

Since facing my fear and going public [with my HIV diagnosis], I was able to connect with organizations like Hill Country Ride for Aids. There I had the privilege to speak at their event and talk about my journey to self love and advocacy. I feel that it’s my duty to show up for anyone who is scared to come out about their status. I want to let the world know that if you’re undetectable [from HIV during treatment], you’re untransmittable. And that is very important.

There is something very special to me about being a Black queer man who has gone through so much because now I’m extremely comfortable in my skin. In this journey of life I’ve learned that there is a process that we need patience for. It has taken me a long time to get here. I understand that lemons don’t just become lemonade. There is beauty in being vulnerable by showing the highs, lows, and setbacks that helped make me the man that I am today.

When it comes to the fitness industry as a whole, I personally think that we’ve lost the beauty of personal engagement amongst each other. Being able to really empathize and connect with individuals on a deeper level gives people a sense of belonging. I believe the key to achieving equality is to build a network of partners, leaders, and members in the fitness and wellness industry to support each other and promote physical activity within the BIPOC LGBTQIA+ community, especially for our youth. Creating these systemic and sustainable changes in the fitness industry will help bridge the gap separating a community that should be united. Period.

Want to read more stories on LGBTQ+ people who overcame obstacles, broke barriers, and found success in the fitness industry? Click the link below.

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